Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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