If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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