Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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