Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
