He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Randomize
