There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
