Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize