One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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