It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
