this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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