Soap is not a condiment
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
