I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
