I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
