and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
