..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
