of course. lets lasso hookers.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
