Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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