I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
