Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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