Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
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