so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
