if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
