I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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