Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
