When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You made out with two different species that night
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
