watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Someone came in the potted fern
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
