Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
