I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Randomize
