I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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