Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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