Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
