Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
