I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
