It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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