He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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