wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
