Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
