Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
