i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
