I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
