What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
