69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
