we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
