u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
