he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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