nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
