I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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