It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
