Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
