Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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