I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
